Car Names Analyzed  

BUICK - Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer

CHEVROLET - Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips

                      Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

                      Cheap Heap, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time

                      Condition Hopeless, Entire Vehicle Relies On Leftover Engine Technology

DODGE - Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere

               Dem Old Dudes Go Everywhere

               Dead or Dying Gas Eater

               Dear Old Dad's Geriatric Express

FIAT - Failure in Italian Automotive Technology

          Fix It All the Time

          Fix it again, Tony!

FORD - First On Recall Day

            First On Race Day

            First On Rust and Deterioration

            Fix Or Repair Daily

            Found On Road, Dead

            Fault Of R&D

            Fast Only Rolling Downhill

            Features O.J. and Ron's DNA

            Found On Russian Dump

GM - General Maintenance

        Great Mistake

GMC- Garage Man's Companion

        Got A Mechanic Coming?

HONDA - Had One Never Did Again

HYUNDAI - Hope You Understand Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive...

MAZDA - Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

OLDSMOBILE - Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everywhere

            Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment

PINTO - put in new transmission often

PONTIAC - poor old Neanderthal thinks its a Cadillac

SAAB - Send Another Automobile Back

        Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown.

        Sorry Arsed Auto Builders

TOYOTA - Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

VOLVO - Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

        Vehicles Of Low Velocity Owners