SECTION: Cricket

Siddhuisms....Need I say more?

                 A collection of famous quotes by Navjot Singh Sidhu
 (former Indian Cricketer who is now an active commentator  for all Indian matches)

 1.. A girl born beautiful is half married

2.. The Indians need to behave as if they are in a boat with a hole.

3.. His slower ball was so slow that my mamma can run faster than that

4.. The world is all about mind and matter, i don't mind and u don't
matter...

5.. In London they drive on the left, in India we drive on what is left!

6.. Still waters run deep. The Indians were so still in the 3rd test that
they ran into deep oceans

7.. Ganguly moves so slowly on the field like jack of jack n jill who goes
to fetch pail of runs for the opposition...

8.. Umpires are like traffic police -the techniques they use to give a
decision are outdated

9.. Flip the coin and there is no head or tail. "India plays the cricket
without any aim"

10.. Harbhajan could be a windmill with a single blade during a
hurricane,when batting.

11.. Strutting around wicket as proud as peacock

12.. A barking dog better than a sleeping Lion So go on Indians Bark aloud
and let everyone hear you louder!!!

13.. The dog that barks last, barks best

14.. S.Ramesh's running between the wickets is like a snail going slow!

15.. He is like an indian transistor which does not work until you give it
two slaps.
 

16.. If u r trying to beat india in their home you are you trying to get
milk out of an ox.

17.. Indian team is just like indian monsoon, you just cant predict when
there will be flood & when drought.

18.. Rahul is like the hall of fire !!!!

19.. Ganguly has taken the cake with plum on top (ha ha ha)

20.. The ball slipped from his hands like butter from hot paratha

21. Women are worse than wine - They intoxicate both the holder and the
beholder (when a female was shown on tv screen)

22. For Geffory Boycott - a hair on head is worth two in the brush (In
response to Shastri's comment "a bird in hand is worth 2 in bush" When
Yohannan was carrying the bird hit by Tendulkar)

1. There is light at the end of the tunnel for India, but it's that of an
oncoming train which will run them over.

2. Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.

3. This quote was made after Ganguly called Dravid for a run and midway sent
him back and Dravid was runout in the third test against the West Indies at
Barbados.
"Ganguly has thrown a drowning man both ends of the rope."

4. Sri Lankan score is running like an Indian taxi meter.

5. That ball went so high it could have got an air-hostess down with it.

6. 'Statistics are like miniskirts, they reveal more than what they hide.

7. Wickets are like wives - you never know which way they will turn!

8. The Indians are going to beat the Kiwis! Let me tell you, my friend, that
the Kiwi is the only bird in the whole world which does not have wings!

9. As uncomfortable as a bum on a porcupine.

10. The ball whizzes past like a bumble bee and the Indians are in the sea.

11. The Indians are finding the gaps like a pin in a haystack.

12. The pitch is as dead as a dodo.

13. Deep Dasgupta is as confused as a child is in a topless bar!

14. The way Indian wickets are falling reminds of the cycle stand at
Rajendra Talkies in Patiala..one falls and everything else falls!

15. Indian team without Sachin is like giving a Kiss without a queeze.

16. You cannot make Omlets without breaking the eggs.

17. Deep Dasgupta is not a Wicket Keeper, he is a goal keeper. He must be
given a free transfer to Manchester United.

18. He will fight a rattlesnake and give it the first two bites too.

19. One, who doesn't throw the dice, can never expect to score a six.

20. This quote was made after Eddie Nichols, the third umpire, ruled
Shivnarine Chanderpaul 'NOT OUT' in the second test at Port of Spain, T&T.
" Eddie Nichols is a man who cannot find his own buttocks with his two
hands. "

22. Anybody can pilot a ship when the sea is calm.

23. Nobody travels on the road to success without a puncture or two.

24. You got to choose between tightening your belt or losing your pants.

25. The cat with gloves catches no mice.

26. Age has been perfect fire extinguisher for flaming youth.

27. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.

28. He is like a one-legged man in a bum kicking competition.

29. The third umpires should be changed as often as nappies and for the same
reason.


but the winner that takes my vote is

During the India-New Zealand test series....Siddhu was trying to get his
point across to Martin Crowe .....who just wouldn't listen.
finally this is what he came up with.....

My dear friend Matin....you are like the Indian three-wheeler which will
suck a lot of diesel, make plenty of noise but cannot go beyond 30; and u
are in serious danger of contracting a desease called Verbal Diarrhea.


FOR THE NEXT 5 MINS ...MARTIN CROWE'S VOICE WAS NOT HEARD AT ALL !!!!

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Contributed By,

        Vfk

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