Those Funny ones...

Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son. "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!"
 "But why, Mom? I don't want to go."
 "Give me two reasons why you don't want to go."
 "Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!"
 "Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready."
 "Give me two reasons why I should go to school."
 "Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the Principal!"
 
 
"Daddy," said a six-year-old boy, "I'd like to get married."
 "Sure, son." said his father. "Anyone special in mind?"
 "Yes," answered the boy. "Grandma."
 "Now, wait a minute," said his father.
 "You don't think I'd let you marry my mother, do you!!"
 "Why not?" the boy asked. "You married mine."
 
Santa Singh spoke frantically into the phone,
"My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
 "Is this her first child?" the doctor asked.
 "No, you idiot!" Santa shouted. "This is her husband!"